Let it Go

“Let go of your grudges.
Let the bitterness die tonight.
Make a decision today that it’s time to move on.
And begin again. New, this time.
Never forget that what has passed you by was never meant to befall you.
And what has befallen you, was never meant to pass you by.
Know that sometimes Allah withholds from you, in order to give you something better.
Keep your heart focused on Him, and He will take care of the rest.
And remember: you will stumble, but that’s part of the path.
Keep going. Keep rising, and refuse to give up.”

- Yasmin Mogahed (https://www.facebook.com/YasminMogahed)

Silver Lining

Ever felt like the most perfect thing in the world was given to you, in your hands? And then it was snatched from you, and turned out to be poisoned; the worst thing possible, for you? And you just couldn’t bring yourself to understand what happened in between?

Don’t ask why it had to happen. Don’t lose hope. And most importantly; don’t lose faith in Allah.

Accept it, embrace the lessons that came from it, and the pain will discard of itself in time.

“But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not.”

- [ Qur'an 2:216 ]

Let’s always search for the hidden blessings in every situation; the silver lining. It’s not always easy, especially when pain is involved, but Allah promises that the good always outweighs the bad in every situation. There’s always more good than bad. We just need to  push past our emotional barriers, and move aside the thick fluff that’s clouding our senses. And only then will we understand. We’ll understand just how much Allah loves us, just how much He offers us in every single situation; a chance to learn, and chance to improve, a chance to change, and yet we choose to ignore it all and wallow in our own misery.

Acknowledging that silver lining will help us shine through the toughest of situations, if only we can train ourselves to be grounded to this belief; not because it’s what I think, but because it’s what Allah promises.

One of those days, where all you want to do is give up, fall backwards, and cry everything out.

If anyone asks,
I’ll tell them we both just moved on.
When people all stare,
I’ll pretend that I don’t hear them talk.
Whenever I see you I’ll swallow my pride and bite my tongue,
Pretend I’m okay with it all;
Act like there’s nothing wrong

[Chorus]
Is it over yet?
Can I open my eyes?
Is this as hard as it gets?
Is this what it feels like to really cry?

If anyone asks,
I’ll tell them we just grew apart.
What do I care if they believe me or not?
Whenever I feel your memory is breaking my heart,
I’ll pretend I’m okay with it all;
Act like there’s nothing wrong.

[Chorus]

I’m talking in circles.
I’m lying, they know it.
Why won’t this just all go away?

[Chorus]

- [ Cry - Kelly Clarkson ] -

A Blast to the Past?

Nostalgia; a feeling I struggle with much too often.

I hate that feeling of waking up, knowing I’m in a certain time and place, yet the atmosphere feels different. The atmosphere feels familiar, too familiar. I woke up this morning and it reminded me of a couple years ago, when I was in secondary 3. Everything just felt that way…the silence, the smell of spring in the air, the birds, and something inexplicable that surged a series of memories through my mind. Or rather, sucked me back to that time.

Maybe I’m over thinking it, maybe I’m being ridiculous, but it just doesn’t go away. Sometimes I like it, something I maybe even trigger it purposely. Why would I do that if it bothers me so much? I don’t know…there’s still a strange pleasure in that feeling – the fact that those memories, that time, feels real again. Now I think I sound creepy…but I’m honestly just letting my words flow out here.

When I think back to myself, and who I was in high school, it’s a huge difference compared to who I’ve become. Of course, that’s obvious and happens to everyone. If we were the same as we all were in high school, that would definitely be something to be concerned about.

In a certain way, I really miss those moments. The freedom, the lack of responsibility, the innocence. And in other ways, I’m glad they’re over. And it’s that strange feeling that really draws me back to them. Who knows? I might feel the same way once I’m done college.

I think I really need to work on “living for the moment”. I don’t want these moments to pass right before me, while I’m stuck somewhere else.

I’m bringin’ focus back, yeah!

So. Last official week of the semester just ended, 2 more days of class to go. I’ve been getting through that to-do list and watching its content be crossed off one by one, alhamdulillah. I LOVE that feeling. My focus has been the best, during this past week, than it’s been all semester. Hopefully I continue it into my summer class and next semester.

Anyways, inshAllah I’m done soon and then my stress will be relieved…in one aspect of my life.

I came across this picture, and it brought tears to my eyes:

It reminded me of how much I’ve been slacking, of how much I’ve been missing. Sometimes we find ourselves in situations where we may feel like we are not as close to Allah as we were once before. The thing that we eventually realize is that we are the ones who distanced ourselves from Him, not the other way around. It’s so unfortunate that the closest we are to Allah is usually when a calamity has struck us. I speak of myself, first and foremost. I’ve slipped up, I’ve gotten lazy, I’ve distanced myself, I’ve realized, I’ve struggled…and after it all, Allah is still there, with open arms, welcoming me back home. SubhaanAllah.

 

Priceless

I came across this on Facebook and wanted to share it:

“You are priceless, even if others mistreat you. This wonderful example below describes this point well…

A teacher raised a 100 dollar note and asked his class who wanted it? Everyone raised their hand, with some raising both. He then squeezed it in his hand, completely crumpled it and asked again, who wants it now? Everyone raised their hands again. He then threw it on the floor stepped on it, stomped on it and crushed it with his shoe until it was completely dirty and then asked who still wanted it!? Still- everyone raised their hands. He then said to them this is your lesson today:

No matter how I tried to change the look and shape of this paper, no matter how I crushed it or trampled it, its value did not change…

So is the case of every human being: If you get insulted or trampled on, dumped or neglected, don’t ever think you have any less value, you are still just as priceless…”

“To do list”

I can’t wait to feel like that picture.

I feel so overwhelmed. I feel like I’m drowning. I also feel like I don’t have time to write this post. Which also means that I’m telling myself that I don’t have time to deal with my emotions. Which is also what I did before and that didn’t work out well. Instead, I ended up bottling up my emotions, being quieter than usual around people, and feeling depressed. Oh wait, that’s also happening again.

I have a to-do list that is growing. It’s like I’m trying to slice the heads off of a 7 headed, fire-breathing dragon, and every time I manage to slice one head off, multiple heads grow in its place. Every time I cross something off my to-do list, more tasks pop up.

On the bright side, my patience and tolerance is improving, alhamdulillah.

Two and a half weeks left. I need to get up.

This made me happy:

“Oh Allah, when I lose my hopes and plans, help me remember that your love is greater than my disappointments, and your plans for my life are better than my dreams” – Ali ibn Abi Talib